Episode 111: The Voices In Your Head–The BFF

This Month we are talking about the 3 characters that chat at us throughout the day and are at the core of The Happier Approach. 

Last week we talked about the Monger–the mean voice tells us we’re not good enough. Today, we are going to talk about the voice we most often use to counter our Monger: the BFF

Our BFF enables us to rebel against the voice of our Monger. When we get tired of our Monger criticizing us, we bring in our BFF for a little self-compassion.

Our BFF is the one who always has our back. She is the type of BFF who is always willing to risk getting into trouble and is always there to defend us.

But she is not about holding our feet to the fire or keeping us accountable. 

She is very good at finding us justification and someone else to blame. She is all about helping us feel special. She is kind and wants us to feel good about ourselves. In her mind, responsibility, accountability, and restraint do not apply. 

Listening to our BFF can be risky. Our BFF loves false self-compassion and uses it as a way to give us an excuse to just do whatever we want.

Our BFF can make us feel awesome, but she can lead to trouble.

In today’s episode:

  • Where our BFF shows up in our lives
  • What Self-Compassion means to our BFF
  • How the BFF isn’t really helping the situation or looking out for our best interests by stirring up drama with our Monger
  • How to find the middle ground between “soldiering on” through the cruelty of our Monger and the false self-compassion of our BFF


The Happier Approach Book

I’ve been working with women like you living with hidden anxiety every day for over 20 years as a coach and counselor.

I wrote The Happier Approach to give you a framework for dealing with your anxiety and start living happier.

The Happier Approach will help you understand the voices in your head and what to do with them. It’s not another woo-woo self-help book that asks you to think positively and live your best life. It’s a practical guidebook for getting out of survival mode and finding a genuinely happy and productive life.

Know someone who has High Functioning Anxiety and a VERY LOUD Monger, the Happier Approach makes a great gift. 

Find The Happier Approach on Amazon, Audible, or Barnes & Noble!

And  Click here to learn more about how you can with me through on-demand coaching!