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Posted January 12, 2020 by

Fear. It is a common theme when it comes to any type of change. Fear of the unknown. Fear of failure. Fear of success. Fear of just making a fool of yourself.   Regardless of what the fear is, if we are contemplating a change, it is usually there. There is only one way to fight […]

Posted January 9, 2020 by

Yes, I wish we had more adventures. Yes, I wish we had fewer restrictions on our time. Yes, I wish this living intentionally, having self-compassion and empathy and showing up for life was a little easier. But overall, I love the messy imperfection that is my life.

I love that I have a life based on my values, and when things get messy and confusing, I can come back to them and remind myself, yes, right now this is what I want for my life.

In today’s episode, I explore how values are the foundation of your life. How they are the guiding principles on which everything else builds. And how when we work through our anxiety to narrow our down our list of values, we can use them to find what is most important to us.

Posted January 2, 2020 by

Postponing our plans for change looks great under the glow of the holiday lights. But when we wake up each year on January 1st, hungover from too much celebrating, realizing with dread, that all of our plans for change in the New Year need to magically start RIGHT NOW, it is a very different story.

All of the plans that we have been putting off until the New Year are suddenly very real and very pressing. We need to get it together and act before our Monger catches on.

The deadline had arrived.

For people with High Functioning Anxiety, the days leading up to the New Year are days full of possibility. Set the resolution, do the prep work, and, poof like magic, we will be different people.

No wonder we are so depressed come the first week of January when we realize that the change we want is only going to happen with work and that the work is going to be hard.

Posted December 26, 2019 by

Michelle Steinhour came to me a few years ago consumed with self-doubt, insecurity and constant questioning. It was showing up in her marriage and in her work. She was looking for practical strategies that would help her feel less doubtful about herself.

I introduced her to my Coach in Your Pocket and Michelle has seen a big shift in her anxiety. But, as she reminds us in today’s episode, it’s a life-long process.

Posted December 19, 2019 by

She holds the goals of your Monger (to be safe and secure) without shaming and belittling you. She provides the support and encouragement of your BFF (“you are awesome”) without giving you a free pass to do whatever you want.

Your Biggest Fan always has your back, acknowledges your feelings, can see options, is wise about the struggle, and uses your values as guiding principles.

Posted December 15, 2019 by

This is the darkest week of the year. Next Saturday is the winter solstice. I have always been drawn to this week, even more so than the summer solstice.   A day of darkness.   A day of reflection. It is also a day of hope. It is the shortest day of the year, which means it […]

Posted December 12, 2019 by

Our BFF enables us to rebel against the voice of our Monger. When we get tired of our Monger criticizing us, we bring in our BFF for a little self-compassion.

Our BFF is the one who always has our back. She is the type of BFF who is always willing to risk getting into trouble and is always there to defend us.

But she is not about holding our feet to the fire or keeping us accountable.

Posted December 8, 2019 by

It’s the holiday season! And for many of us, the holidays mean time with family, which equals a whole mess of feelings. Joy, pain, loss, comfort, trauma—it runs the gamut of emotions. Dealing with family dynamics is tricky. A big reason is that many of the buttons, traumas, or triggers that family members push were […]

Posted December 5, 2019 by

There are other voices in your head–the BFF and the Biggest Fan–but of the 3 characters that are at the core of The Happier Approach, the Monger is the loudest of them all.

Posted December 1, 2019 by

A friendly reminder that you are okay just as you are. In my world of personal development and growth, I want to pause from time to time and share lovingly that you are perfectly wonderful right now, even if you never changed or grew again. Growth is awesome. Wanting to improve is a fabulous and worthy […]