Author Archive
Posted November 14, 2019 by

It starts with recognizing when your High Functioning Anxiety is running the show. Once we start learning to recognize the signs of High Functioning Anxiety and developing the coping skills to deal with our anxiety, we can start calming the storm and finding the ease that we are looking for.

Posted November 10, 2019 by

Today I want to explore those thoughts and beliefs that we hold dear. In many ways, they are like old songs that we play over and over. Maybe they were messages we received as children, maybe they are based on experiences we have had, maybe they are just inexplicably there. These thoughts and beliefs become […]

Posted November 7, 2019 by

The challenge is that we are hooked. The benefits of High Functioning Anxiety are the things you’ve accomplished, the accolades you’ve won, and the praise you receive from the outside world for being so with it. We live off of this.

This can’t last. While we appear to have everything under control at the end of the day, what we really crave––a sense of calm and ease––is still painfully out of reach.

Posted November 3, 2019 by

When was the last time you did something for fun? Not because it would get you closer to your bigger goal, or because it would help someone, or because it made practical sense? When was the last time you did something just because it brought you joy? I have noticed a pattern with myself and […]

Posted October 31, 2019 by

We live our lives in When Then statements. We spend too much of our time waiting, hoping, wishing for our broken selves to be fixed so THEN we can be happy. 

What if you aren’t doing anything wrong? What is happiness isn’t something you attain permanently? What if you are thinking about it wrong?

Posted October 27, 2019 by

We all know that real change is slow. And yet, when change is slow, we beat ourselves up for doing it wrong. The marketing industry has convinced us change is fast, and if you aren’t changing fast, you are doing it wrong. We KNOW losing weight .5 to 1 lb. a week is healthier and […]

Posted October 24, 2019 by

Recently my husband had an extended hospital stay. 

The number one question I received from my well-meaning friends and family was: How are you going to take care of yourself while he is in the hospital?

“The best I can,” I told them. But this just did not satisfy their curiosity.

They wanted to hear about all the bubble baths, yoga, and meditation I had planned for this stressful time. But I knew better. There wasn’t a bubble bath in the world that was going to make this easier. 

My husband was in the hospital. It was going to be stressful. I didn’t know what to expect. The self-help industry’s’ idea of self-care wasn’t going to be any help.  I was simply going to do the best I can.

All this month we are looking at how the self-help industry has sold us a bunch of toxic information. And for those of us with High Functioning Anxiety who love looking outside of ourselves for the answers, this toxicity is especially troubling.

In today’s episode, I take a closer look at self-care and how it isn’t just yoga, bubble baths and breathing apps. Self-care done well is the ultimate in self-loyalty.

Posted October 20, 2019 by

One of the differences between High Functioning Anxiety and Generalized Anxiety disorder is there isn’t panic attacks and fear but rather the anxiety takes shape in more of a low buzz. I know I am in trouble and I know my High Functioning Anxiety has taken over when I get stuck on the to-do list […]

Posted October 17, 2019 by

You’ve heard that winning isn’t everything but deep down you know that isn’t true. Striving to be the best is how you keep your edge.

In the last episode, I discussed the self-help industry’s positive thinking problem. In today’s episode of the Happier Approach, I discuss with Clair Booth, author of The Achiever Fever Cure: How I Learned to Stop Striving Myself Crazy, what it takes to start flourishing without being a high achiever.

Claire was a successful but stressed-out market research entrepreneur and executive suffering from what she calls “achiever fever”—constant striving coupled with chronic feelings of inadequacy. Sick and tired of feeling miserable–but ever the self-help skeptic–Claire decided to try anything that might bring relief, from mindfulness to martial arts, from spending ten days in silence to “smiling” at her spleen. At first, Claire was fearful that slowing down and softening up will mean losing her professional edge.

Instead, she discovered a more joyful and purposeful life, one that also turns out to be good for business.

Posted October 13, 2019 by

One of the ways we protect ourselves from the judgment of our Monger (inner critic) is to start judging other people. In my book The Happier Approach I talk about three characters: The Monger (inner critic), The BFF (false self-compassion), and our Biggest Fan (the voice of wisdom and kindness). Today I want to talk […]