Episode 163: Lou Blaser and the Performative Nature of High Functioning Anxiety – Part 2

Anyone with High Functioning Anxiety knows what I mean when I talk about the Swan Effect.

It basically boils down to the feeling of being so on top of it and accomplishing everything we set our sights on… compared to the overwhelm and exhaustion that we feel under the surface that no one can see. 

My guest on this series about the performative nature of high functioning anxiety is no stranger to the Swan Effect. 

In part one of this podcast, Lou Blaser from the Second Breaks Podcast and I talked about the Swan Effect and what it feels like to be calm on top and yet paddling like mad, metaphorically, underneath. We also discussed when Lou realized she needed help and what therapy taught her about anxiety and depression. 

On today’s episode, Lou and I continue the conversation around the performative nature of high functioning anxiety with Lou. For her, learning to recognize that tendency is a sign that her depression and anxiety have spiked and that she needs to step up her self-care.

If you feel like no matter how anxious you are that you need to appear on top of it, this episode is for you. And don’t miss part one, which you can listen to here.

Listen to the full episode to hear:

  • Why sharing your anxiety is so hard and finding the right pair of ears is essential
  • The sneaky ways we sabotage ourselves 
  • Why therapy isn’t a fix-all and the disappointment in realizing Lou won’t be magically fixed
  • The power of self-loyalty and changing how Lou had her own back was so important

Learn more about Lou Blaser:

Learn more about Nancy:

Coach in Your Pocket

Helping people with High Functioning Anxiety is a personal mission for me. I have a special place in my heart for this struggle because it’s both something I dealt with unknowingly for years, and because it silently affects so many people who think this is just how it is.  

Working with me this way is an incredibly efficient and effective way to deal with your anxiety in the moment–without waiting for your next appointment.

I have been doing this work for over 20 years and Coach in Your Pocket is the most effective and most life-changing work I have ever done. My clients are consistently blown away by how these daily check-ins combined with the monthly face-to-face video meetings create slow, lasting changes that reprogram their High Functioning Anxiety tendencies over time.

Over the course of the three-month program, we meet once a month for a face-to-face session via a secure video chat, and then throughout the entire three months, you have access to me anytime you are feeling anxious, having a Monger attack, celebrating a win, or just need to check-in, and I will respond to you during my office hours (Monday through Friday, 9 am – 6 pm EST).

Ready to get started? Email me: and we’ll set up a free 30-minute consultation to see if this process is a good fit for you or click here to learn more about how you can work with me through on-demand coaching.