Want to stop losing your cool with those you love?
“There is more hunger for love and appreciation in this world than for bread.”
I love the quotes that make you pause and think, this would be one of them. I have written on this blog about kindness and appreciation, even about love. I wonder at times what keeps us from embracing the world with love; it seems like such a simple practice. But I know in reality, as we go out into the world this concept is a challenging one. It is challenging to let down our anger, hurt, sadness and fear. To release our agenda or judgments in honor of love and appreciating someone else or even ourselves. I know when I am most judgmental it is when I am feeling most insecure. It is this insecurity, this pain when allowed to run amuck causes the most damage to ourselves and those around us.
For many of us that hunger starts from within, we feel unworthy, unappreciated, unloved. We walk around with chips on our shoulder because we have hammered ourselves so hard there is little left. We have a vision of perfection, of how we should be and when we fall short we beat ourselves up at our core and don’t let up. And then we turn on those closest to us, wondering how they could love something so vile and full of muck as we are, we push them away with our frustration and pain. Then when they react negatively to our unkindness, we feel justified that yes we are in fact despicable human beings and the pattern start all over again. The truth is, we can’t expect someone to treat us with kindness and love us unconditionally if we aren’t at least attempting to love ourselves unconditionally. The other truth is we are all full of muck. We all have fears, sadness, imperfections. We are all doing the best we can with what we have. The beauty is being honest about those glitches and owning them, rather than pushing them down and hammering ourselves with them so when they spring forth they come out in bitter resentment.
In my opinion, the only way we can go out into the world with love and appreciation is to start giving that to ourselves. To start each day giving ourselves a little kindness, paying attention to the negative messages we send ourselves, and the times when we hammer ourselves. Being open and honest about our fears/concerns/our muck rather than keeping it all trapped inside, And at the same time, treating those around us with a little kindness, Once we can start giving ourselves a little love we can share that kindness with others. Together we can end the hunger for love and appreciation.