Want to stop losing your cool with those you love?
This week I am on vacation…completely disconnected not doing anything vacation with my nearest and dearest. Here is the story of how it came to be that way, how I was reminded to practice what I preach and what I love about Living Happier and Trusting Yourself as a Life Philosophy.
If you have been following me for awhile you know that living by your values is paramount to living happier. I teach about it, I work with clients on it, and it is part of the Trust Yourself Already Wellness Series. Yet another big part of the Live Happier Philosophy is the concept of making small changes, recognizing this is a journey and having some self compassion. ALL of those concepts came into play for me over the past few weeks. This is a glimpse into how Living Happier plays out in my day to day life and the nasty truth that even when you think you have it mastered you don’t. Spiraling up is real.
This week my nearest and dearest and I are headed out on vacation—just us. For the first time since our honeymoon. We have had vacations since our honeymoon…but they usually involve family or friends and have also involved the occasional accident (broke my leg riding a Segway on the first day of our romantic San Francisco holiday) So when a friend invited us to her wedding in SC I jumped on it and rented a condo on the beach for us to spend the week…just us.
Three of my top Five values are: Adventure, Emotional Health, Relationships. And as we approached the vacation…things started picking up in my business, the phone started ringing, more emails started coming in…and the thought of being away for 7 days freaked me out. AND I knew that I NEEDED this vacation. I needed the break, my relationship need the time and attention, and I was itching for a little adventure. So to comfort my anxiety I told myself that I would take a vacation but not REALLY take a vacation, I would still check emails, respond to phone calls and be ‘on call’ at the beach. Basically I would have one foot in and one foot out on vacation.
Then one night a couple of weeks ago my nearest and dearest and I were out to dinner…it was the first time in a while we had just TALKED not about family or work or our dog (who recently got diagnosed with Diabetes and sent our world spinning–she and we are doing much better now) we just talked about our dreams and our hopes and the shifts we were experiencing as we entered our 40s and how life seems to keep spinning faster and faster. As we walked to our car, I felt the most relaxed and connected I had in months I thought…”What do you want? What do you need?” I realized I needed to put my values in the forefront. I told myself, “You can’t be half in and half out on vacation…you have to be all in. You owe it to yourself, your values and your life to TAKE THIS VACATION.”
Bottom line no none is going to give you permission to live your life based on your priorities and values…only you can give that to yourself.
So I am all in on vacation which means I am out …I am not answering emails, not checking phone messages. I am honoring my values…practicing what I preach and giving myself and my marriage a much needed chance to rest and regroup. Emails, phone calls and everything else will be here when we return and I will be more rested and ready to respond.
See you on the other side…just in time to talk more about my favorite topics…living from your values.. Living Happier 101: The Basics of Finding Peace and Contentment–which takes place June 25th from 7-8:30pm at the Loft.