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Stop Pursuing…Start Living


If I had a magic wand, I would give everyone the gift of never forgetting that life is indeed a journey.  So many of us (myself included) KNOW that life is a journey.  We KNOW there isn’t a magic button. And still, we become seduced by the belief that once I figure out _____ (Self-compassion, my weight, anxiety, self-talk) then I will be forever healed.If only I would meditate, eat mindfully love myself THEN I would be at peace.  We hold on to this belief for dear life. We become obsessed with it.  We become addicted to growth.

Here is the truth.

Life is a Journey no matter how many books you read, courses your take you won’t be healed. You have to show up, do the work and be intentional each and every day.

Here’s my advice:  Stop Pursuing…Start Living.

Let’s agree to jump off the self-improvement train. Let’s agree to put down the books that tell us 5 Easy Ways to be Happier. The books that convince us that all we have to do is learn these 5 simple things, and we will be healed.  Because inevitably, one of those ways is to love yourself;  as if loving yourself was something you can learn to do one time and know forever.

You are imperfect. Life is messy.  You can still live happier.

But, how can I possibly be happier when I am so miserable?!? (you may be asking)

Stop searching. Stop pushing. Stop trying SO HARD to do it RIGHT.

Take a big exhale and remind yourself YOU ARE OK. Right now. Tears streaming down your face, confusion in your soul, anxiety making you feel like you are crazy. You are ok.

Take another big exhale and give yourself a break.

This constant need for self-improvement this constant push, push, push is the opposite of loving ourselves.

It is time to scream a collective ENOUGH. And give ourselves a break. Put down the book, turn off the podcast and just be.

Be with yourself. Be with that confusion. Be with the anxiety. Stop running. Stop pushing. Stop improving.

Start loving. Start listening. Start feeling. Start treating yourself like the friend you have always wanted.

Start asking yourself:

What if there is no need to change, to transform yourself into someone who is more compassionate, more present, more loving or wise?  How would this affect all the places in your life where you are endlessly trying to be better? 

What if the task is simply to unfold, to become who you already are in your essential nature–gentle, compassionate, and capable of living fully and passionately present? 

What if the question is not why am I so infrequently the person I really want to be, but why do I so infrequently want to be the person I really am?

Prelude to the Dance by Oriah Mountain Dreamer

Start showing up for your life with love.

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