Episode 017: I Think I am Addicted to my Phone
Do you spend too much time on your phone? Is your phone controlling your life? Last week, I realized mine is more prominent in my life than I want it to be so I declared this month a “Screen-Free Month”.
+ Read the Transcript
This episode is going to be a little different. I wanted to talk about a personal struggle of mine, and that is my phone. I have struggled off and on with being addicted to my phone and using it to escape when I'm in a social situation, using it as a way to deal with my anxiety, using it as a way to stay in touch.
It is my best friend and my worst enemy all at the same time. On Sundays, my husband and I always watch CBS Sunday morning; it's one of my favorite shows. I like the last 10 minutes of the show where they do a nature scene. It's the last 30 seconds, but sometimes I'll watch the whole show just for that last 30 seconds, or I'll fast forward through the whole show for that last 30 seconds.
But this week, they had a piece with Paula Poundstone, who was talking about cell phones and iPads and the whole gamut of things that we use to distract ourselves. She was specifically talking about kids and what all this screen time is doing to our children. It was profound and just knocked me into my senses to be like, wow, you are addicted to your phone. If I am not on my computer, I'm on my phone, or I'm on my iPad.
My husband and I will joke that I can sit in front of the TV watching a TV show while playing with my iPad. So it's not just one screen, but two that I need to relax. So after watching that show on Sunday, I was thinking to myself, okay, I'm going to do a screen time vacation for the month of December. And so here we are, it's December. I'm recording this on December 2nd.
And so two days in actually yeah, two days in, so I started that on Monday, November 30th. This is my third day, and this has been challenging for me. So I just wanted to share my reactions and what's been happening for me in hopes that it would help you if it's something you struggle with.
I've been surprised by how addicted I am. I almost wanted to start the show by saying my name is Nancy Jane Smith, and I'm addicted to my phone. It is like a jonesing almost to have that distraction, especially in the morning, because in the morning, the first thing I do, I get up, check my phone, and look at my email.
I look at my Facebook. I look at Instagram. I read blogs. I do this stuff while watching TV, while eating breakfast, while walking around the house, taking care of the animals. I'm also on my phone looking at what's happening in the world. And so to come downstairs and just be with my animals and do the chores in the morning and not have my phone has been fascinating.
It's been nice to have that relaxation time and that time just to be doing one thing at a time, rather than constantly multitasking. But it also has been hard because I realized that I am always looking for it. I'm always wanting that fix of being on my phone. So it's been an interesting experience.
And last night I went out with a friend and she was late. She was about half an hour late actually to meet me. And I was at a wine bar, and I was sitting there with my glass of wine and had my phone in my purse, but I couldn't touch it because of this December phone ban, and it was interesting.
I can't tell you the last time I sat at a restaurant by myself, and I had nothing. Usually, I have a journal or something in my purse, but I didn't bring that purse this time. I just brought a little wallet. And so I didn't have my journal. I didn't have my phone, and I could just sit there and breathe and look around and take in the Christmas decorations and the lights and the beautiful wine shop that it is.
And it was amazing how hard that was to sit there. And I kept thinking, what are people going to think of me? Do they think I'm staring? What are people going to think about me just sitting here doing nothing?
And that was uncomfortable for maybe a minute or two, but then it just became nice. I'd had a hectic day yesterday. So to be able just to sit there and relax and think and not be on my phone all the time was refreshing. So it's helped me. Relax. It's helped me be more present in my life.
It's helped me recognize that I'm not all that important. Facebook is surviving just fine without m constantly checking and liking and seeing what everyone's doing. And I am doing just fine in my business. Because I used to use it as an excuse that, oh, I need this for my work, I need to be checking all these blogs.
My business has been just fine without checking all the bogs and seeing when everyone else is writing out there. I don't think I've lost any brain cells because I haven't seen the latest and greatest blogs. If anything, I think I've become more connected with myself and my life. And what's happening right here in my little home in Columbus, Ohio, and with my little family that I have here.
And that's been nice. So like I said, I'm only on day three, so it's just beginning, and I will keep you all posted as this goes along. I wanted to announce it somewhere, and I didn't want to announce it on Facebook because I thought that was ironic. So I thought this podcast was a great place just to share this journey.
Because this is where I share my stories on living happier, I think this recognition of how much screen time I use to escape from my life and then just being present to it without the screen time will be impactful to this live happier journey that I'm on. And I would love to hear if that's something you can relate to, or if that's something you're struggling with as well.
And you are welcome to join me for the December free of screen time event. And I'm hoping I can last the whole month. It will be interesting to see. So that's my insights on living without screens and living without Facebook and email.
For the record, I am still on all those things. I'm just on them, only on my computer. The next thing will be the challenge of not running upstairs to my computer all the time, which I don't think that'll be a challenge. The rule is I can get on Facebook and email, but I can only do that from my main computer, which has been challenging and helpful.
+ Weekly Ritual Challenge
One thing that has really helped me reduce anxiety is adding regular ritual practices to my daily life, so each week, I am going to be sharing a ritual with you and challenge you to complete it.
This week's ritual: Ask Yourself Does this Really Matter?
I have been doing this more in my everyday life. While sitting in traffic or in line, I ask myself does it matter if there is traffic? Can I do anything about this? Nope. I can’t. Reminding myself to breathe, relax and remember some things are out of my control (ok most things are out of my control) is helpful.