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Earlier this week I wrote a blog about women living their lives at half steam because of the relationships in their lives. While I thought it might strike a cord with some people I was surprised to see with whom. Even though I was writing about and for women, I have had more responses from men then women. I had men e-mail me, men respond via facebook and the men in my life (including my nearest and dearest) weigh in on the subject.
I have to admit I thought I might hear from some men. But I thought I would hear, “what about us…we sacrifice our dreams for relationships”. Because that is true…we all sacrifice for our relationships. But what I heard from the men out there, warmed my heart and was pleasantly surprising. They said, “I don’t want the women in our lives to feel this way” “I want them to have a life that makes their heart sing, including their job” I have to admit it gave me a lot of hope about the relationships in the world–these men who are wanting to support and encourage the women in their lives.
So it got me thinking about this epidemic the idea that we are living half lived lives because we feel too many SHOULDs or IF ONLYs. Because we are waiting until we meet our partner, have kids, the kids grow up, or even retirement to fulfill our dreams we are missing out on a lot of life. A lot of time.
I believe step one is to start talking about it. Let’s start asking ourselves and each other–am I happy? am I putting my life on hold for my relationships? And if the answer is yes, what small changes can I make to live differently. I am not advocating for us all to leave our families and head back to the workforce or plow full speed ahead into our careers and forget our dreams of finding a mate and building a family. I am advocating having a conversation with yourself and those closest to you. Let’s start sharing what’s holding us back from making our heart’s sing and maybe together we can come up with a plan.
The male responses to my blog post made me realize again that we are in this together, we are all trying to do the best we can with what we have, we are trying to support each other. Sometimes we just don’t know how.
I believe, by living a life that is authentic, genuine, and honest we can live happier and work happier. First step–speak your truth.