Want to stop losing your cool with those you love?
If you have ever watched the show Weeds, you have heard the song “Little Boxes” this song epitomizes the idea of cookie cutter loves–check out the video below. Or if you are watching this via email–check it out here.
Thanks to BeautifulDay for the clever video of Ticky Tacky.
This song always makes me smile, because it is so true. On one hand as humans we love similarity, sameness, consistency. We love having a plan, knowing the next steps, having the path laid out in front of us. We want to know school, career, marriage, house, kids. There can be a switch up to the order of that–but what if things don’t fall in that order? Or what if they do and you still aren’t happy?
Cookie Cutter Land means we have in a sense, given up on really paying attention to our own values, wants and needs and have swallowed whole the social norms of life. So rather than living a life based on our own inspiration, ideas and thoughts we have just followed what everyone else is doing. Now don’t get me wrong, we all need guidance, a little cookie cutter, in my opinion, is a good thing. It gives us a direction. Provides us with a starting point and even an end goal. The issue for me is that cookie cutter land, by it’s very nature does not have differences. It does not allow for growth or change. To live in Cookie Cutter Land means we are stuck in a sort of quick sand of expectations, pressure and outside direction. When we live in Cookie Cutter Land we can get stuck in anxiety, driven by to-do lists and ‘shoulds’, we miss the joy of life. We miss the fun because we are always chasing the carrot that some magical baker in the sky told us we could get (but he just keeps moving it) and to be honest, we don’t even know who this baker is or why we put him in charge.
So what can you do if you wake up one day and realize you are living or dangerously close to a Cookie Cutter Life?
As you have heard me say. Awareness is ALWAYS the first step. So just pay attention to your life.What do you like about it? If I were to observe your life would I see your unique style? In what areas, have you bought the idea that other people know better than you? Where do you regret letting go of your unique ideas and replacing them with other people’s ideas?
Look back at you at a younger age. For many of us when we were in high school or college we were celebrating our uniqueness. We found a group of people who accepted us and it was ok that we were passionate, excited and ready to change the world. Who were you then? What were you excited about? Is that excitement/passion still there? How can you add it into your life?
When you look at your life right now–what do you value? For many people, this is a tough question. But I believe it is the first step to figuring out what you want your life too look like. When you know what you value you aren’t as likely to get caught up in what people tell you that you SHOULD value. You can make decisions about your life and the direction you want to take it. Need help naming your values? Sign up to get a free copy of my Live Happier 101 Mini Course to get started.
One of my missions is to help those people who are tired of having a Cookie Cutter Life–who want to reconnect with themselves and live a life that is true to who they are–who want to Live Happier. I too got stuck in Cookie Cutter land, but fortunately was able to break free. My life looks traditional-house in the suburbs, dog, cat, husband. But it is uniquely mine. You don’t have to sell your house, leave your family and move to a commune to break free from Cookie Cutter Land. You just have to live a life that is true to who you are.